Taking a Quiet Moment

As a wife, mother, and business owner, I don't have a lot of quiet time in my life. I worry, a lot, but usually it is about things that are happening in the moment. Did I remember to sign field trip forms? Did all the kids take their lunch to school? Have I paid my quarterly transaction tax at the office? Lots of questions that need answering, but none of them really eternally significant. 

This week I read Enos chapter 1. Enos seems to be a guy with a lot going on. He wasn't focused on the spiritual side of life, but was more involved with day to day type of stuff. However, while out hunting by himself he found the world to suddenly be quiet. The quiet brought about personal reflection, and Enos realized he didn't like what he saw. The message of his Father about eternal life meant something new to him when he looked at where he was in his mortal life. Instead of dismissing his thoughts, Enos dropped to his knees and prayed for forgiveness. He prayed all day and in to the night until a voice told him he had been forgiven. 

Reading this scripture made me think about where I am in my life today. What would my thoughts be if I found myself in a quiet space. If I looked at my life, would I find it to be in order with God's teachings, or would I, like Enos, feel an overwhelming need to drop to my knees and ask for forgiveness. I'm pretty sure it would be the later. So, the take away message for me is that sometimes we need a quiet moment to reflect. We need to get our life in tune with the Savior's plan and plead for forgiveness where forgiveness is needed.

Choose Your Own Adventure

This week I have been pondering the topic of destiny. What determines our destiny in this life? Is it fate that was predetermined long before we were ever born? Or is it the choices we make throughout our existence here on earth? President Wilford Woodruff said that we are "responsible for the course we pursue, the lives we live, the deeds we do". This quote really touched my soul this week. It made me question where I am in this life, and what got me here. It also made me question my future, and what destiny I have in front of me. In all the super hero movies that my family and I love to watch it seems like destiny is predetermined by fate... no matter what they do  or choices they make, they will end up facing their destiny. While I do still think that we all have things we are meant to accomplish in this life, President Monson stated that the "choices we make determine our destiny". This tells me that I can still change the direction of my life by making different choices. Of course, Heavenly Father knew all along that we would make those choices, so I suppose fate does play a part in the eternal scheme of things. However, just knowing that I am able to accomplish more than what I have so far gives me renewed purpose. I still have dreams, hopes, and aspirations. But, at 32, I have been feeling like my time to accomplish those things have past. As I was thinking about President Monson's council, I decided to think about what my end goal here on earth was. What is that I want to have accomplished by the time I die. After the passing of my father-in-law, I thought about how sad it was that he and my mother-in-law were never able to retire and serve the mission they had always dreamed of. I decided that my goal is to be able to have my husband retire by 65, and with that in mind I have been working backwards with my goal setting to get me to that point. So, instead of just dreaming to be rich and successful, I am instead going to focus on getting the education I need to have a career that will allow me to save enough to retire by that point. Having my destiny planned, gives me a purpose for the work I do each and every day.

Gratitude takes more than Attitude

Today I woke up determined to make it a great one! I had decided that I was going to stay calm, cool, and collected in all my interactions so that it could be a positive and productive day. Of course like sharks can smell blood, my kids can sense when I am trying to let things go and they strike with all their collective abilities to rattle me. The baby is fussy, my five year old wants another snack, my 7 year old can't find his shoes, and my ten year old is unwilling to get out of bed. And that is the first hour of my day. Add to that a full time job running a business that I own, as well as dealing with the financial burdens that never seem to end and you can understand why making gratitude an attitude just doesn't seem to cut it. However, I recently watched a video clip from President Uchtdorf that talked about being grateful in any circumstance.  This clip really touched my heart because I frequently long for easier days that seem so far away. Elder Uchtdorf said "Could I suggest that we see gratitude as a disposition, a way of life that stands independent of our current situation? In other words, I’m suggesting that instead of being thankful for things, we focus on being thankful in our circumstances—whatever they may be." This really struck me because it was a way of being grateful I had never thought about. Instead of worrying about what I have or don't have, I can be grateful for where I am in my life that day. When my kids are screaming and my house is a mess I can grateful for Netflix and it's ability to give me an hour of quiet time to clean up while the kids watch a show. When my baby is fussy and constantly crying I can take a minute to be grateful that I have a healthy baby that wants me to cuddle with him. Stress and bad things are still going to happen, but finding a way to enjoy my life in all its stages is what makes for a happy existence.